Chihiro

I'm never the type to post frequent blog updates, but this time I wanted to share a life-changing experience that I was fortunate enough to experience.

I think we can all agree that 2020 was such an awful year. 2020 filled my heart with worry and sorrow, as well as sympathy for those who unfortunately passed because of the Covid virus. I'm always anxious whenever anyone from my family is outside. I just feel like it's never safe out there no matter how ridiculously careful you are. The world is just not the same anymore. Looking back, I really wish I cherished the pre-pandemic world. I hated going out then and I want to slap myself with a brick for not socializing with friends enough, and not appreciating the outside world enough. As much as I love and truly enjoy being home all day, there's just something so anxiety-inducing with the fact that you CANNOT and SHOULDN'T go anywhere unless it's for buying necessities like food and water. I never really liked being out and about, but quarantine days got me thinking otherwise.

I suddenly like going out on road trips. I've come to love long drives, windows down with nice music playing in the background. I suddenly enjoy eating out and meeting with friends. These are the things that I never really liked doing pre-pandemic. I didn't know how precious "freedom" is until it's taken away from me... from us. People lost their jobs, businesses went bankrupt, and worst, people are dying. 

I sort of viewed the pandemic as something that only happens to people that I don't know of.. to strangers. Until one day, it hit close to home. A former close friend of mine sent me a message one day telling me that my old best friend's dad died. And yes, it was Covid. Since then, I couldn't stop thinking about the "what-ifs". What if I actually somehow contracted the virus while I was out despite being overly careful? What if someone I met with got in contact with someone infected with Covid, or worse, actually HAS the virus? What if one day, I'll wake up to find out that one of the people I love has the virus? What if things never go back to normal? These "what-ifs" filled my mind every night. 

My 2020 was looking dark and grim, until one day, while I was having lunch with my family, it hit me. My sister, who I used to almost never see and talk to was right in front of me, having her lunch like any normal day. We grew close during the pandemic and I'm glad she's home all the time now. My brother actually managed to get a job and is now working from home (so is my sister). Everyone in my family just seems a lot closer than ever before, thanks to being confined at home together. We get to share the simple joys of eating at home (ngl, we just almost always order online lels). We get to enjoy watching horror movies together while having unhealthy snacks so late in the night. These are the small things in life that the pre-pandemic world lacked. This experience literally showed me things that I was missing out on in life. And for that, I am grateful. 

I am grateful for always having food on our table. For being healthy still and for (thankfully) not having any of my family get sick. The best part of all this is having a wonderful chance to care for the sweetest dog in the world. Mid-2020, Chihiro, our Shih Tzu dog, came into our lives and magically made all our worries and stresses disappear. She brought us closer together and gave us joy every day. 2020 was so much more bearable, thanks to this adorable little ball of joy. I never knew that having a dog can bring so much meaning and hope to one's life. I know it's so cheesy and cliche, but I just don't know anymore how I managed to live life without her. She's so much more than just a dog... she's family to us. A living being that we hold so close to our hearts. 

Today, I count my blessing and not the misfortunes. I still get anxious about things, but each time I start having toxic negative thoughts, I play with my dog and then I'm okay. It's hard to stay positive at times like these, but try not to dwell too much on the bad things. Start being grateful for the things you still have and trust me, it will make you happier. Count your blessings! 

Here's to welcoming 2021! 🥂

Jaa~

Nitz 🖤

A New Beginning

So, I finally did it. I finally had the courage to do it. I am free and happy, and I know everything will be alright.

I've been so stressed these past few months about this and now that I've finally decided to let go of it, I feel liberated. Gone are the days of crying myself to sleep and waking up feeling exhausted. Gone are the days of stress-eating and self loathing. I can now sleep soundly at night knowing that tomorrow will no longer be the same. Tomorrow is finally something I can look forward to. After so many years, I now feel like I can go back to my old hobbies and actually enjoy doing them. I feel inspired and positive about everything. I will work hard and give my best so that this opportunity won't go to waste. I am sooo thrilled and nervous, and I know I will be alright. I believe in myself. I believe that I can do this. In times of doubt, I will look at myself in the mirror and tell her that she's everything she will ever need. I'll tell her how brave and capable she is. I'll remind her to look inside her and see and feel what she truly desires. This is what you wanted, self. You can do it. I can do it. I'll be alright.

My Top 5 Favorite Android Apps 2019

I've always loved reading articles about this and watching YouTube Videos about different Android apps that I actually might find useful, so I thought why not write a blog post about my favorite topic? :)

I've been using Android for god knows how long. Say, maybe around 8 to 9 years now? Below is a list of all the apps that I can never live without. Cheret.


1. Twitter

I loooove Twitter! Been on it since 2009 and I don't regret keeping this account (shameless self-promotion lol). Like most people, I use it as an outlet 'cause why not? Don't you ever get this feeling when you want to vent out but don't have anyone to talk to? I know. Being the anti social (how ironic) person that I am, I don't really have a lot of friends and I'm perfectly okay with that. The downside is, they're not always available. I always find myself looking for an outlet of some sort. Be it writing, drawing, singing (forgive me, Lord), or just randomly scrolling through 9gag and Twitter. I like how Twitter is not as toxic as Facebook, albeit still polluted with problematic people (including myself lol). You can follow whoever, whatever and right now it's still not as heavily polluted with ads as with some other social media platforms. I mainly use it to stalk people (cheret) and read news/articles that I find interesting. Mostly about aliens, ufo, science in general, technology, and BTS. Yes, I'm an ARMY. 

2. Amino

I discovered this about a year ago, and my golly I just love this! Amino literally has something for everyone. You like blogging? There's a community of blog enthusiasts here. You like creepy stuff? There's tons of communities here that will suit your taste. Whatever it is that you're interested in, you're most certainly going to find that here in Amino. If you want to be inspired or just want to know more about a certain topic, just look it up in Amino and you'll find what you're looking for. The community is super nice and supportive, too. 

3. Spotify

One does not simply own a smartphone and not have any music streaming app installed. Seriously, I don't know anyone who doesn't listen to music on their phone. I've tried different kinds of music streaming apps like Apple Music, Google Music, Soundcloud, etc., but nothing beats Spotify in terms of functionality, user interface, and music quality (except for Apple music...maybe). I love how I no longer need to download a separate app for podcasts and radio. I love listening to podcasts while driving to and from work. It's not that distracting compared to songs (cause yeah, I'm the best driver in the world) and I am obsessed with Mysterious Universe. It's also a lot more affordable than it's competitors and I've never had any problems with it. 

4. Duolingo

If you want to learn a new language, there's no better app than Duolingo. I used to study Nihongo years ago (self study) because I am very interested in the Japanese culture and I'm obsessed with anime. I want to be able to watch animes without having to read the subtitles. I reached to a point where I can actually understand intermediate level Nihongo , but I lost interest and stopped studying. Now, I want to learn this language again so I downloaded Duolingo. Best decision ever! It's highly effective. All lessons come in form of challenges and it's completely free. According to them, 34 hours of Duolingo is equivalent to a semester of university-level education. Learning another language is definitely a good investment, especially if you want to earn more money as a working individual.

5. Pocket

Last, but not the least is Pocket or previously known as Read It Later. It's an application for managing a reading list of articles from the internet . It allows you to save an article or a web page on its servers for later reading. It saves it in a clean, readable format free from clutters. You can also organize your list by adding tags and changing the font, text color, background, etc. It's also free. 

And there you have it. I have more apps on my phone than I will ever need so I thought I'd write a post about my top 5 apps so I can let go of other apps that I'm no longer using. All of these are also available in iOs and Windows. Gosh, I never really know how to end a blog post. 

Forever matakaw,

Darnae ❤

Same old, same old, but not really.

Wow. Just wow. I never thought I'd find this blog again. How long has it been? Last time I posted something here was ages ago. I was still working for this sorry of a company back then (hahaha no hate tho).

So many things happened over the last couple of years. Life really is a roller coaster. I remember back in college, I was so sure that I will become a surgeon one day,  but nah. Life slapped me in the face like his b*tch and fast forward to 2018 2019, I'm now a working professional in a software company somewhere in Ortigas, far from my forever dream of becoming a doctor. Am I disappointed? Maybe. Maybe not. See, what I learned so far is, life almost always never happen the way you want it to. It's really not like the movies, but I still think it's wonderful...very. I may have not gotten to where I wanted to go, but I am where I should be. It's not always sunshine and rainbows, but I grew so much as a person and learned so many valuable life lessons that I wouldn't trade who and what I am now for anything else. I've met many people, and lost more. I may not always be happy, but I am satisfied.

I can't believe it's already 2019. I mean, how come? I was freaking twenty just yesterday! in just a few weeks, I'll be twenty six. It's so crazy when you think about it. You go from being a pa-sweet teenager to a mid-twenty stressed and oversized adult in a blink of an eye!

I wish I had kept writing here so I can look back at my teenager self and laugh more haha. My golly, aren't I the cringiest person ever?

I don't know what to say anymore. I want this year to be full of positive vibes. This year, I will focus more on myself. I won't be as hard on myself. I will walk more slowly and enjoy the everyday war-like commute. I will eat slower and actually savor the food. I will forgive myself for making mistakes and being angry over the littlest of things, pat my back for working hard, and surviving yet another day without breaking down. I deserve all the happiness in the world. No more self loathing and self pity. Just love. ❤




Forever matakaw,
Darnae

Let The Good Times Roll!

Contrary to my previous post, this one will be about the precious moments that I've spent with awesome, crazy, lovely people :)

My phone won't stop bugging me about how low my remaining memory is, so I had to make this post just so I can let go of some of these pictures without really losing them. Sucks to be poor, eh? XD

First pic of wave 16

two of my most favorite persons in the world! just how lucky can I get? :) 

fierce XD di kinaya ng puno. 

#boyhamog(read as hastag boy hamog) and Ka-Ipe

HAHAHA! can't help but burst out laughing whenever I see this photo. XD seriously.. back story: we were having our lunch at the pantry, and of course, as usual, I'm only focused on what's on my plate.. gobbling it down like there's no tomorrow... when suddenly, I noticed the two of them watching something on TV.. so intently that it actually took my attention away from my food. I looked up to see just what these boys are watching.....and voila! they were watching Barbie of Swan Lake. Yep. Two grown up men...watching barbie as if it's some kind of action movie. You can even see #boyhamog's mouth slightly open.. I guess he was awestruck at how beautiful Barbie is? idk hahahahaha

From L to R: Enzong Dee, #boyhamog, Mari, and Pulpol

we were headed to SM Mega, I believe.. XD and to save money, we kind of forcibly fitted ourselves in one taxi. And yes, as you can see (though I'm not on the picture) all of us are pretty big in size... except Enzong Dee on the leftmost corner.. I'm so sorry Enzong haha

just a random shot of #boyhamog worshipping the karaoke monitor

#boyhamog bragging about his toy XD edi wow!

In all seriousness, am I the only one who finds this photo hilarious? it's like he's saying "I killed this chicken with my own hands..... see these remaining bones? I'll eat them for snacks later"

 I think this was when we had electric cheverlu hydrotherapy.. XD this is my TL! She's the best.... and it was really hard for me to adjust after she left :( haha can't wait to hang out with this kabogable tl again

when you're so full, even breathing becomes a task :D

#boyhamog with our beautiful supervisor :)

because working in cc requires you to work even on Christmas and New Year, we had a little salo salo

we always eat fast... so we always end up with over 30mins spare time during lunch.. and what do we usually do? tambay! XD

 

caption this! XD

 

 reunited with these folks again! can't wait to see you soon! I have more ghost stories to tell XD *wink wink*

 #boyhamog, Mari, and Berting

Freedom Billing Anniversary party! :)

after shift hang out with Team Pietro

#boyhamog, shamelessly taking a pacute selfie during our break

team lunch

this shot tho XD it's like a movie poster. I'll just leave it here...

I'm telling you.. I'm a guy trapped inside a  girl's body

I just can't help but be happy when I'm with these people. So joy, very cheerful, much love XD (doge?)

we were supposed to go job hunting...but ended up at Mcdonalds XD why? just why???

Enzong Dee, y u do this???

 

me with Enzong Dee.. XD 

 training days.. Ding, Judy, Darna

and lastly, I present to you......

*drum rolls please*

 me with crush! let's just call him Prof Snape for now.. I've been crushing on this guy for eight months now.. XD I'll save this photo's backstory for later XD

Aaaaand there you have it. I should've warned you that this post is going to be quite long.. nvm. :) these past eight months sure was tough.. full of surprises (both good and bad) but I surely will treasure these memories with these heaven-sent people :)

Jaa~